@*#% Or Get Off The Pot

You know what frustrates me? Meeting men who actually sound human. They are smart, funny, good looking, employed, have a vehicle, and know where their kids are. These men that seem to have their acts together are elusive little fuckers. Over the course of my online dating experiences, I’ve met a few of these mystical creatures. But then, the most amazing thing happens. They turn into a new thing entirely. They are the caterpillar of men. They cocoon themselves in texts and infrequent phone calls, and transform into a man far too busy to date. Their time is eaten up by mysterious things that probably stand for: M.A.R.R.I.E.D, E.N.G.A.G.E.D, or otherwise completely UNAVAILABLE… sorry got tired of trying to be amusing with my periods. catepilar

I met one man who lives in Cape Carteret, and another on the Outerbanks. Both seem like decent men that I appear to have a great deal in common with. Both are elusive and problematic for having a face to face greeting. It really is sad that people seem to prefer living their lives in the cyber world. To what end? One I’ve been talking to off and on for like six months. The other is fairly new in my realm of dating.

So let me do a quick recap for those new to my blog: I suck at dating.

I haven’t been on a date in weeks. Sex? I barely even remember what that is. My prospects of actually getting married one day seem to dwindle by the wayside with each day that passes. Biological clock? Bitches I have a Matrimonial Timex that will blow yours out of the water.

In other news, I read a kick ass book. Google Brooklyn Ann. She is a kick ass writer. (Also she writes back when you write to her at 3 am.)

Tonight I’m going to lose more sleep and read her third book in a series about vampires. It’s historical, which usually isn’t my cup of tea… but seriously its fantastic and worth it.

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